Once Upon an Idiot
by Animeluvr234
Summary: Funny things that come to mind having to do with inuyasha
1. Once Upon an Idiot

-Disclaimer I do not own any of these characters, actresses, songs, phrases, or any other things I did not create on my own.  
  
This story starts out in the feudal era of Japan. Inuyasha is the gay one who wishes to be a girl, Kagome is the village idiot but seems normal, Miroku is a pervert, and Sango and Shippo are somewhat normal. I am normal but not really so we start off and Inuyasha is stealing my bras again.  
  
Me: Inuyasha give those back!  
  
Inuyasha: But they look so beautiful on me  
  
Me: YOU DON'T HAVE BOOBS!  
  
Inuyasha: That could change they have plastic surgery in Tokyo don't they?  
  
Me: Even if they did........  
  
Inuyasha: see they do ha!  
  
Kagome: SIT!  
  
Inuyasha falls to the floor  
  
Kagome laughs manically  
  
Both Kagome and I take off our shirts  
  
Kagome: I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts!  
  
Me: Inuyasha has a flat chest!  
  
Kagome: There he stands in awe!  
  
Me: Singing I WANT PLASTIC SURGERY!  
  
Inuyasha: SHUT UP!  
  
Sango and Shippo walk in  
  
Sango: What's going on here?  
  
Shippo: Yeah, what is going on?  
  
Me: Just singing to Inuyasha sticks out tongue  
  
Miroku walks in  
  
Miroku: HUBBA HUBBA!  
  
Me: slaps Miroku in the face stop looking at me you pervert!  
  
Kagome: I Still have a lovely bunch of coconuts, some may say I am a slut but I like when the guys touch my butt.  
  
I walk out  
  
Me: good god when will it end I'm going home.  
  
Jumps into well  
  
Me: ALYSSA MILANO! Wtf??  
  
Alyssa: Hey Yoshimi!  
  
Me: Uh what are you doing here?  
  
Alyssa: Anime is all the rage and I need better rating so here I am  
  
Me: ok fine lets go  
  
Alyssa: HIPPEE KI-A!  
  
Both jump in well  
  
Alyssa: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S A DOG BOY!  
  
Me: That's just Inuyasha  
  
Inuyasha: Humph my name isn't Inuyasha any more, its LaShawnda 


	2. Once Upon an Idiot 2 the sleepover

-Disclaimer-I do not own any of these characters, actresses, songs, phrases, or any other things I did not create on my own.  
  
Inuyasha has just changed his name and who knows what could happen read on to find out what happens in the soap "Once Upon An Idiot"  
  
Kagome: LASHAWNDA!!!!!!!!!  
  
Inuyasha: Yeah, you got a problem with it.  
  
Alyssa: I do, because it sounds made up  
  
Kagome: So this is how the whole making up names started.  
  
Inuyasha: I need my beauty rest lets all have a sleepover!  
  
Miroku: So Sango what nighty are you going to wear tonight?  
  
Sango: SLAP I'm not telling you!  
  
Miroku: You know you love me!  
  
Kagome: EVERYONE JUST GO TO SLEEP!  
  
-Day 2-  
  
Kagome: Where's Inuyasha?  
  
Sango: Where's Alyssa?  
  
Miroku: Uh Um... I don't know  
  
Sango: Spill it Miroku!  
  
Miroku: Okay, Alyssa took Inuyasha for implants  
  
Kagome: HOW DID THEY EVEN GET THROUGH THE WELL?  
  
Miroku: Oh heh heh they also took the jewel shard  
  
Kagome: WHAT!!!!!!!!????????  
  
Miroku: They left you one too if that helps any.  
  
Kagome leaves to find "LaShawnda"  
  
Miroku: So Sango guess its just you and me wink  
  
Sango: Dream on Miroku.  
  
Me: Sango there is no hiding it Sango Beats the hell out of me  
  
Me: Well its true!  
  
Sango: You sure you don't want to take that back?  
  
Miroku: Ooooh catfight, WAIT! Let me get a baby pool and some oil! No wait PUDDING!  
  
Inuyasha: IMMMMMMMMMMMM BACCCCCCCK!  
  
Miroku: have we met young woman? Would you consider bearing my children?  
  
Inuyasha kisses Miroku  
  
Me: OMFG!  
  
Inuyasha: What?  
  
Me: Oh I don't know, THE FACT THAT YOUR FRENCHING MIROKU!  
  
Miroku: OMG! That's Inuyasha?!?!?  
  
Inuyasha: eh hem it's LaShawnda get it straight girlfriend  
  
Me: That's it! Grabs Inu We are going back to china!  
  
Inuyasha: Yeah thanks Yosh I need bigger boobies  
  
We both jump in well  
  
Me: Doctor we need breast reduction and we need his privates back.  
  
Dr. Yoshimitsu: Can do  
  
Me: oh also could you please hypnotize him and make him believe he is a guy again?  
  
Dr. Yoshimitsu: Again, can do.  
  
Stay Tuned and see what happens next on "Once Upon An Idiot" 


	3. Once upon an Idiot 3 the sleepover 2

-Disclaimer- I do not own any of these cartoon characters, but I do own some of the phrases.  
  
-A Sleepover-  
  
Me: I'm so bored on this lonely Saturday night time to call Shorty!  
  
Dials number  
  
Shorty: Hello  
  
Me: Hey yo wassup, wanna sleep over?  
  
Shorty: Sure!  
  
Me: well then get your short lil ass over here!  
  
Door bell rings  
  
Me: That was incredibly fast  
  
Shorty: Well yeah. But promise me one thing  
  
Me: What's that Shorty  
  
Shorty: DO NOT KICK ME AGAIN!  
  
Me: I'll try but no guarantees  
  
Shorty: OK  
  
Me: Come on  
  
Shorty: Where are we going?  
  
Me: TO APPLE WORLD!  
  
Shorty: No seriously  
  
Me: Oh nowhere just coughFeudal eracough  
  
Shorty: you mean!!!!????  
  
Me: yep  
  
Shorty: YIPPEE-KI-A!  
  
both jump in well  
  
Me: hey gang this is Shorty  
  
All: hey Shorty!  
  
Me: Sorry if Inuyasha is mean he just had surgery  
  
Kagome: My baby is back!  
  
Me: Kagome, see the money go fetch!  
  
throws fake money far, far away  
  
Me: that will keep her busy whispers under breath prissy biotch  
  
Sesshomaru pops out of nowhere  
  
Sesshomaru: Prepare to die Inuyasha!  
  
Shorty: whispers to me who is that?  
  
Me: that's Sesshomaru, Inuyasha's brother whispers he lives in an asylum  
  
Miroku: I have been in there, my advice is to drop the soap as much as possible  
  
Sango: Miroku that's prison  
  
Miroku: it's the same thing only the guys in the asylum are more pleasing  
  
Shippo: Miroku! Please stop, go on the computer or something  
  
Miroku: will do bbl lata ya'll  
  
Me: when did you get all ghetto fabulous!  
  
Shorty: Hun I was born ghetto fab  
  
Me: so any1 for some games?  
  
All: OO OO ME! ME!  
  
Me: alright howz about truth or dare?  
  
Inuyasha: Sounds good to me  
  
Sesshomaru: ME FIRST!  
  
Me: Ok  
  
Sesshomaru: Shorty, Truth or dare?  
  
Shorty: Dare me sucka  
  
Sesshomaru: ok, I dare you to... Uh Um  
  
Me: ok then I dare you to kiss Sesshy  
  
Shorty and Sesshy kiss  
  
-10 mins lata-  
  
Me: poke poke uh Shorty?????  
  
Sango: I'm out cuz I'm tired nighty night  
  
Inuyasha: Guess it's just you and me Yosh  
  
Me: what in the world do you suppose we do?  
  
Inu kisses me  
  
-See what happens next because I'm too tired to write so BYE!- 


	4. Once Upon an Idiot 4 the carnival

-Disclaimer- I do not own these characters except me and yes I OWN YOU SHORTY! MUWHAHAHAH!  
  
-A trip to the Carnival- - Me and the gang decide to go to the carnival. Shippo cannot come though, he is too small SORRY SHIPPO! Oh and Kagome died, I pushed her off the edge of a cliff -  
  
Me: so gang where to today?  
  
Sesshy: can Shorty come?  
  
Me: fine. ::calls Shorty:: Hey Shorty wanna go somewhere with us?  
  
Shorty: Is Sesshy home?  
  
Me: Yes he's home, so are you coming?  
  
Shorty: HELL YEA  
  
Sesshy: Is she coming, is she coming? Huh huh huh?  
  
::Slaps Sesshy in the face::  
  
Me: yes, she is coming  
  
Sango: So where are we going anyways?  
  
Inuyasha: THE CARNIVAL! THE CARNIVAL!  
  
Sesshy: NO THE MOVIES!  
  
Me: ok play rock paper scissors for it  
  
Inu and Sesshy: rock, paper, scissors  
  
::Inu has rock Sesshy had scissors::  
  
Inu and Sesshy: rock, paper, scissors  
  
::Sesshy has scissors Inu has paper::  
  
Inu and Sesshy: rock, paper, scissors  
  
:: Inu has paper Sesshy had rock::  
  
Inuyasha: I WIN! We're going to the carnival, we're going to the carni ::oof:: val  
  
:: Shorty arrives::  
  
Shorty: so have we decided where to go yet?  
  
Sesshy: ::glomps Shorty:: MY LOVE YOU HAVE RETURNED!  
  
Shorty: Yes I have and I will never leave you until 5 Sango: Ok well I get motion sickness so I'm not going, plus I need to look after Shippo.  
  
Shippo: WHY CAN'T I GO?  
  
Inuyasha: you're to short  
  
Shippo: ::Sista snap:: Oh no you didn't  
  
Inuyasha: I just did and I will again  
  
::Everybody gets in the car::  
  
Me: Inu please turn on the radio  
  
Inuyasha: the what?  
  
Me: oh never mind ::turns on Kiss FM::  
  
Shorty: ITS TISPY!  
  
Me and Shorty: Everybody in the club getting tipsy!  
  
Inuyasha: ::poke:: ::poke:: where is that music coming from  
  
Sesshy: ::bite:: BLAH! Gross its not food  
  
Me and Shorty: LOL!  
  
Me: it's a radio  
  
Shorty: yeah and it plays music  
  
Inu and Sesshy: ::sweat drop:: huh?  
  
Me: we're here!  
  
Inuyasha: YAY!  
  
::Everybody gets out of the car::  
  
Me: where to first?  
  
Sesshy: THE MERRY GO ROUND!  
  
Inuyasha: YEA!  
  
Shorty and Me: wow, they agreed on something  
  
::we all go in the line for merry go round::  
  
Inuyasha: what is taking so long ::IRON REAPER SOUL......:: Me: SIT BOY!  
  
Sesshy: heh heh  
  
Inuyasha: you little.......!  
  
- more to come - 


	5. Once Upon an Idiot 5 the carnival 2

-Disclaimer- I do not own any of these characters except me and Shorty  
  
We last left off when me and the gang were in line for the merry go round lets see what happens now  
  
Inuyasha: YAY! We are next in line ::giggles like a little girl::  
  
::Shorty slaps him across the head::  
  
Shorty: stop it!  
  
Me: stop being so mean!  
  
Shorty: Don't make me kick you  
  
Me: ooo I'm shaking in my lil' sandals  
  
Sesshy: Enough girls we are about to go on  
  
::Dude opens gate for us::  
  
Inuyasha: I WANT THE PINK PONY!  
  
Sesshomaru: NO I DO!  
  
Me: Inuyasha sit whoops I mean lay your but down and be happy  
  
::the ride starts::  
  
Inu Sesshy: WEEEEEEEEE  
  
Me: Shorty do you ever worry about them?  
  
Shorty: All the time Yoshi, all the time  
  
::the ride ends::  
  
Inuyasha: Lets go in the tunnel of love  
  
Me: ok ::giggles::  
  
::We all get in the line::  
  
Shorty: what if we don't end up with our guys  
  
Me: oh we will or there will have to be hell to pay! ::maniacal laugh::  
  
::we all get on::  
  
Me: WAIT A MINUTE your not Inuyasha!  
  
-see what happens next at the carnival- (sorry I have written 3 stories today my brain hurts) 


	6. Once Upon an Idiot 6 the carnival 3

-Disclaimer- I don't own anything so yeah  
  
-Recap- We all went in the tunnel of love and I was with someone else.  
  
Guy: What!!!!!! WHO ARE YOU!  
  
Me: SESSHY!  
  
Sesshomaru: OMG!  
  
Me: well this is extremely creepy, ::snaps and switches Sesshy and Inu:: Hey Inu!  
  
Inuyasha: How did you do that? How come you never told me about this.  
  
Me: There are a lot of things I haven't told you  
  
Inu: ::in squeaky girl voice:: OO TELL ME!  
  
Me: why should I?  
  
Inu: Because I'll be your best friend! ::kisses me::  
  
Me: My god Inu! ::kisses back::  
  
::we both fall into the water::  
  
Inu: COLD!  
  
Me: oh shut up and swim!  
  
::both of us come out soaking wet::  
  
Shorty: was it that hot in there  
  
Sesshy: You guys look like the people from Titanic in 30 seconds re-enacted by bunnies  
  
Me: shut up or I'll snap you to hell  
  
Shorty: what are you talking about you cant.........  
  
Me: oh but I can ::snaps Shorty to Amanda Chaplin's house::  
  
Amanda: HEY CAITLIN!  
  
Shorty: YOSHI!!!!!!! YOU BITCH!  
  
Me: :: snaps back:: now what were you guys saying?  
  
Shorty: ::whispers to Sesshy:: You think George is in town?  
  
Me: I heard that! ::snaps Shorty on Mega Drop::  
  
Shorty: YOSHI!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  
  
Sesshy: gee Yoshi talk about pissy  
  
Me: You wanna be on that too?  
  
Sesshy: Is it scary?  
  
Me: well, just consider this on the way down I screamed fuck the whole time  
  
Sesshy: Right, well how bout we go on spin out  
  
Me: ::starts blabbing about how awesome spin out was and won't shut up:: ::accidentally snaps fingers:: WHERE AM I!  
  
Larry: Your in Veggie Tales!  
  
::all the veggies start to sing the theme song::  
  
Me: I gotta get out of here! ::snaps out::  
  
Shorty: I hate you.....that was the scariest thing I have ever been on.  
  
Me: ::evil grin:: ::snaps Shorty and Sesshy on mega drop:: come on Inu, lets go to Spin out.  
  
Inu: right-o  
  
::both wait in lone for spin out::  
  
Inu: are these lines always this long?  
  
Me: Yea, but at least we can talk for a while.  
  
Inuyasha: That's true  
  
Me: so what's up  
  
Inu: ::Kisses me::  
  
Me: uh hello  
  
Inu: sorry sudden impulse  
  
::awkward silence::  
  
::we both get on spin out::  
  
Inu: Yoshi I'm scared  
  
Me: its ok I'm here for your pansy ass  
  
::rides starts::  
  
Inu: holy crapperdoodles!  
  
Me: wee hee!  
  
::the ride ends and we get off::  
  
Shorty: I am going to kill you  
  
Me: uh oh ::snaps me and Inu back to the house::  
  
Inu: Well that was a fun trip but what happens when they come home  
  
Me: Lets go to Hawaii or somewhere like that  
  
Inu: Works for me I love this new power and ::mumbles:: I love you too  
  
Me: what was that?  
  
Inu: Nothing  
  
-The End fun adventure eh? Well review and send suggestions so I can write more stuff and yeah- Yoshi! 


End file.
